A Sermon by Rev. Henley, July 13, 2008
Once, a long, long, time ago, on earth there were only bacteria and amoebae. They were single-cell organisms, solitary and asexual. To reproduce, they only had to divide in two. Then by chance, over 500 million years ago, multi-cellular organisms evolved. To reproduce, these multi-cellular organism had to find a mate. This is when sex began.
Ever since then, all multi-cellular creatures are compelled by the biological processes of their bodies to have sex in order to reproduce. It is really quite simple. There is an overwhelming drive to find a mate and have sex. In some species, the drive may be to mate one time, ensure the deposit of new life, and then die. An example would be the seventeen year locust we have here in the Washington, D.C. area. In other species, life-time mates may be chosen, the female may have one or more offspring, and both adults live to see successive generations. The life cycle and the dependency of the offspring vary; but not the genetically encoded drive to reproduce.
If sex is such a natural process for all multi-cellular creatures, why is it so complicated for human beings?
For human beings, sex is more than a biological drive. Emotions and feelings are involved. So are our minds and cognitive responses, as well as our ability to enjoy sex without the need to reproduce.
Our reading from Song of Songs this morning could have been written by a poet living today, but it wasn’t. It was written about 3,000 years ago. It is a love story, and speaks to anyone who has ever desired another. There is a lot of sex in the Old Testament and the story tellers are very candid about the circumstances. These stories may sound “familiar,” but remember, they aren’t from today’s soap operas, or “Desperate Housewives,” or even “Sex in the City.”
They are from the Old Testament.
In Genesis there is the story of Judah, who would not follow tribal custom and marry his youngest son to his widowed daughter-in-law Tamar. Once Judah became a widower, Tamar, a barren, young woman, tricked him into sleeping with her. She became pregnant—which is what she wanted—and had twins. The Scriptures never tell us if they were married, only that Judah never slept with her again.
There is the story of another Tamar in Second Samuel and Ammon. Ammon was the son of Samuel, the first great tribal leader of the Hebrews. He fell desperately in love with his half-sister Tamar, and was so obsessed that that he raped her. Absalom, Tamar’s brother, then killed Ammon to revenge his sister.
Rahab, a prostitute of Jericho, hid the spies of the great tribal warrior Joshua. For her courageous act she and her family were protected by the tribe. Eventually, she became a respected member of the tribe and is one of the five women listed in Matthew’s lineage of Jesus.
Ruth, Naomi’s beloved daughter-in-law, tricks a wealthy relative Boaz into having sex with her so that she and Naomi will have a place to live and a secure position in the tribe. The great King David plotted to have one of his generals killed in battle so he could marry beautiful Bathsheeba, the general’s wife.
There is Esther, a young Hebrew woman whose beauty took her to a King’s harem, and whose brains took her to the throne as his Queen. It was as a Queen she was able to save her tribe from destruction.
We can’t pass up the incestuous Lot, whose daughters, sure there were no men left alive after the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, forced themselves on their father because they could not stand the thought of being childless.
For human beings, sex is more than a biological drive. Emotions and feelings are involved. So are our minds and cognitive responses, as well as our ability to enjoy sex without the need to reproduce.
Have you seen the movie Forgiving the Franklins? It is a dark, tragedy, although it has its brighter moments, and is definitely “R” rated.
It was research.
The story is about a “good Christian family” who fits right into the southern, fundamental Bible culture. There is a father; mother; the son, a senior football star; and a daughter, the popular cheerleader. They are all narrow-minded, full of the guilt of original sin, and, of course, judgmental. The young daughter struggles to understand why life is so difficult when she prays all the time and tries to live the life of a “good Christian teen.”
The family is in an automobile accident and the parents and the son have this shared, dream-like experience where they meet Jesus. Jesus is chopping down crosses in this vast empty field, and says something about regrets and “if he had only known.” Then he asks their permission to remove something from their heads, and in shock, they say, yes. Jesus then proceeds to take an apple out of the back of their heads, and tells them they will be all right; they will live. They do, and without the “apple in their brain” they become tolerant, inclusive, and loving individuals, with a healthy attitude and healthy appetite for sex.
The apple is, of course, the symbol of original sin. The Hebrew people did not see the Adam and Eve story as a story about sin. There were then and now many ways to interpret the story: the enlightenment of humankind, the dawn of consciousness, it could even represent the watershed invention of writing. But eating the apple as the sin of sexual shamelessness was not the dominant myth of the Hebrew people.
It was in the fourth century that Augustine of Hippo, church theologian, and father of western Christianity, propagated the “SIN OF THE APPLE TREE.” Augustine was the son of a Christian mother and a pagan father who was unfaithful to his wife. Augustine, scholars tell us, loved a woman and had children with her, but refused to marry her, because she was “beneath” him.
Some scholars say his mother’s abandonment by his father, and his father’s “excessive” profligate lifestyle affected Augustine tragically. Others write that he was confused about his own sexuality. Whatever the reason Augustine had for his low opinion of sex and women, proved to be tragic for the Christian story. For centuries now, the scribes, theologians, and priests of the western church have denigrated the beauty and value of sex.
What does the New Testament say about sex? There is a disconnect between the Old Testament and the New Testament. Neither Jesus nor Paul says very much about sex at all.
The only thing Jesus said about husbands and wives is, “Don’t get divorced.” The authentic Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 7:1-7, that it is good to have a celibate life and dedicate one’s self to God, just as Paul had. He also said that people should get married, rather than be sexually immoral.
Of course, we have to look at what Paul meant by “immoral” in the context of his time. The culture of the Jews clashed with the Greco-Roman culture. His reference to “sexual immorality” was a comparison of his own tribal customs in opposition with the more urbane and worldly Roman culture. The Hebrew people had always been culturally conflicted with their oppressors.
In fact, Camille Paglia, the well-known social critic, has divided the sexual mores of western civilization into two camps: the Judeo-Christian and the Greco-Roman. This contemporary description of the differences highlights Paul’s concern in the first century.
However, throughout the years, western Christianity has taken Paul’s words and St. Augustine’s theology to negate and denigrate women and sex.
There is no way in one sermon to explore the complex issue of sexuality as it has been, and still is seen, by fundamental and literal Christians. Augustine’s “SIN OF THE APPLE TREE” has been long-lasting in our western, Euro-American culture.
For human beings, sex is more than a biological drive. Emotions and feelings are involved. So are our minds and cognitive responses, as well as our ability to enjoy sex without the need to reproduce.
Sex today permeates our society in every media outlet this modern society can invent. It is implicit and explicit in advertising, movies, and even sports. Remember Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake and the Super Bowl halftime a few years ago? At the time, it was the most-watched TiVo rerun in television. The images are still on YouTube. Of course you have to be 18 or at least “say” you are 18 to view the video. I guess it is rated “R.”
It was research.
Young people today, in general, have an entirely different, and I believe healthier view of sex. They don’t see revealing clothes as an indication that a woman or man is promiscuous—like many of us baby boomers. They accept an individual’s sexuality and wonder what all the fuss is about sexual orientation. Many teens are waiting later to have their first sexual experiences. And many have a much more mature view of their own sexuality than previous generations.
Think about it, a century ago, people would rarely say the word “pregnant;” a woman was “p.j.” Now young women are, healthfully so, proud of their baby bellies! Research shows that today, attitudes are healthier where sex is concerned. I believe, that in the future, sex and sexuality will continue to become healthier.
That is not to say that there isn’t work to be done. There are many individuals who sexually abuse themselves and others. There are still people who risk their lives for sex, especially young people. As a society we must find a way to educate and inform these young people. Government funded programs, in the majority support abstinence-only programs, and have very little information on prevention of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.
As a people of faith who believe in the inherent worth and dignity of all and Jesus’ message of inclusion, we are called to help inform and educate. Did you know, that most sex education programs today in schools and those supported by our federal government, are “abstinence only” programs, and few even talk about prevention of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. I would suggest that we find someway to make a difference so that our young people will be better informed and their lives will be healthier.
And now, for our own lives, our own sexuality … Sex is a sacred gift. It is a blessing and a physical and sensual means of enriching our lives. No matter our partnership status, no matter our age, no matter our physical abilities, sex—our own sexuality—is with us all our lives.
Once interviewing an eighty-three year-old neighbor for a university class project, I asked her what she missed most about being younger. She immediately, with no hesitation, said, “Sex.”
I cannot say like many fundamental Christian preachers that sex is only for married couples. I am a Christian preacher of a free religion, grounded in reason and knowledge and an individual’s search for truth and meaning. I believe sex is so intrinsically woven in our genetic coding; that many times, our bodies “think” for us. And that is probably not always a good thing!
Sex, our reading from Ursula Goodenough suggests, “… feeds into the second facet of sexuality, the need for other.” Sex allows us to show love, connect to another human being, to find some security in a world that challenges security. Sex provides solace when a loved one dies. Sex affirms our identity as living, breathing, loving person. Sex allows us to be honest with another, to be brazen when we are naturally shy, to be shy when we are usually outgoing. Sex gives us an opportunity to give, when we are sometimes too selfish in our relationships. Sex can fuel our creativity.
Sex, though, above all else, is a sacred act. Meaning, it is a miraculous invention, that should—and I always use the “should” word very carefully—be honored. Whether we have sex with a life-long partner or, if we choose, with a consenting adult. It should be honored whether it is a romantic interlude or a mutually agreeable act of relaxation and letting go.
What? I am giving anyone permission or telling us to have sex outside a committed relationship? No. I am saying that sex with another person should be seen as a sacred act.
It is a gift from the Ultimate Creator of life, a gift to make our lives better, more fulfilling. If sex with another person does not make our lives better, then something is wrong, and we better step back and find out what is going on.
Last, for those of us who do not have committed relationships, or we have long-distance relationships, and we do not want sex outside a relationship, then we have an opportunity to use our inherent sexual energy for creative and life-affirming efforts. We can channel the gifts of senses into the arts, music, writing, or good works. I did not say, into our jobs or careers. Unless we have a job that is spiritually rewarding, then our jobs are not the place to channel our sacred sexual energy. Do we really want to “spend it” on something as profane as work?
For human beings, sex is more than a biological drive. Emotions and feelings are involved. So are our minds and cognitive responses, as well as our ability to enjoy sex without the need to reproduce.
Sex, we’ve come a long way from bacteria and amoebae. Our human sexuality is a sacred gift. Honor God’s gift with care and respect.
May it be so.
Reading I
From The Sacred Depths of Nature, Ursula Goodenough
Animals with nervous systems take the behavior possibilities for sexual attraction to every possible limit. Fireflies pulse, houseflies beat their wings, moths send out musk, fish dance, frogs croon, birds display feathers and song, mammals strut and preen. If this is a planet shimmering with awareness, then a great deal of that awareness is focused on the sexual signals that creatures send to one another.
If we look to our closest relatives, the bonobos and the chimpanzees, we find quite different approaches to sexuality. The bonobos have sex with one another—male with male, male with female, and female with female—about ten times a day, often to reduce levels of conflict or solidify alliances, but often just because they seem to enjoy it. The chimps, in contrast, have only heterosexual sex, and only when the female is in heat. Neither group is monogamous, and although dominant chimp males attempt to monopolize one or several females, “dalliances” occur frequently.
The range of human sexual behaviour includes all of the above. In addition, humans profess allegiance to the concept, if not always the practice, of committed marriage. This commitment feeds into the second facet of sexuality, the need for other.
Reading II
Song of Songs Chapter 3:1-4