Friend is a word that evokes many levels of emotional response within us.
A friend we no longer have, s/he betrayed me
Friend we no longer see because s/he lives on the other side of the world
Friend who was our best in elementary, but in junior high s/he had other friends
Our high school and college friends, most we’ve lost, a few we’ve found, and one or two have always been there for us
A friend who died in the seventh grade from leukemia
Our best friend in high school who was murdered after graduation by her husband, a troubled veteran
Our best friend in college who was killed on the way home from spring fling
The friend who comes to your mind often, but have no idea where s/he lives Someone who turned out to be very unhealthy and it was awful breaking off
A colleague from our first job who moved away and we can’t remember her/his last name
Our mother’s best friend’s son/daughter who always calls mother on holidays and her birthday, even though his/her mother has been dead fifteen years
Dearest friend, best friend, BFF, BFFL, Bro, Cuz, Sis, Dude, Homie, Home Slice, Ace, Bestie, Buddy, Bud and all the words in our culture that mean friend—holds deep significance for each of us. There may be sorrow, joy, pain, gratitude, acceptance, happiness, loneliness, and a myriad of feelings associated with it, however, we cannot underestimate what friendship has meant for us and means to us in our lives today.
This past Thanksgiving was the first time since moving to Washington that I had my own friends to share the day with. What a joy and a blessing that was. While I have many friends at the church, first and foremost, I am your pastor and minister, and cannot—will not—ever expect you to meet the needs deep friendship offers with those for whom I am not that minister. You know, of course, but I will not ever stop telling you, that I love you and whatever you need in times of challenge, all you have to do is let me know.
This New Years, I am celebrating with my young “surrogate” family, Loya and Moges, and their three young ones, Bezawiet, 11, Bethlehem, 2, and Abel, 10. How fortunate I am to have been their neighbor when I lived in Silver Spring. Loya and Moges are Coptic Christians from Ethiopia, and have taught me more than I ever thought I would know about their Christianity and Ethiopia. Their friendship is as dear to me as if they were my real family, and this New Year I celebrate the privilege of being their children’s surrogate grandmother.
My hope and prayer for all of us is that in this New Year we work toward deeper friendships with those who offer healthy friendships to us, and explore, with more contemplative promise, our relationship with God.
See you in church, Pastor Lillie